Dear Queer Auntie,
As a part of the LGBTQ+ community, I find it hard to navigate situations where folks talk about marginalized communities I am not a part of. It makes me uncomfortable because I don't know how to act or what to say. How can I be a better ally to them?
Signed,
Unsure and uncertain
Hello there, dearie!
Thank you for your question! It's true that it can be hard to learn how to be an ally to other marginalized communities when you are a part of one yourself. My main piece of advice would be to follow the same guidelines as other allies. As a part of the LGBTQ+ community, think about how you would want others to be better allies to you and your community. Use that as your guide for how to be a better ally to others. How would you want them to react to you talking about your community? How would you want them to behave or treat you when you do?
Educating yourself and staying open to learning about marginalized communities, their culture, and their challenges is one of the most important parts of being an ally. Where possible, it is always better to ask instead of making assumptions.
It is also important to consider intersectionality. While you may be a part of a marginalized community or maybe even more than one, if you are learning about a marginalized community you are not a part of, it is important to recognize your privilege and never take it for granted.
Remember that you do not have the same experiences as the communities you are not a part of, and that you should make space to listen and learn from those that do. It is also okay to share how your experiences might be similar in nature to others but always make sure you are listening first as you would want if you were the one sharing about your experiences and your community. When listening, it can be helpful to acknowledge your privilege in conversations to show those around you that you are understanding and open to learning about them and their communities.
I hope this helps! You are already on the right track just by asking about it and wanting to learn more! Keep reflecting and aiming to be a better ally. You are doing great!
Love,
Your Queer Auntie